Dear google keyboard

I just hate you so much. Actually, since you just just updated and eliminated the classic “return button” feature (like, that’s soooooo 90’s) for an emoticon button, I just actually spent money on Swype. And also, since you just updated and eliminated the classic “return button” feature (like, that’s soooooo 90’s)…

FUCK YOU WITH A RUSTY FORK.

Let me repeat that–I SPENT MONEY on Swype.

To bring that statement into focus, I don’t think I’ve ever spent money on an app.

To bring that statement into perspective this is my third smartphone.

To bring that statement into perspective, we’re talking since 2010.

To bring that statement into perspective, let me just spell everything out explicitly–In five years I haven’t felt the need to spend a measly $4 on a download until right now, because google completely fucked up and took away a CORE COMPONENT to the FUNCTIONALITY of the MOST BASIC USER INTERFACE humanity has ever devised for INTERACTING WITH AN ELECTRONIC DEVICE.

TL;DT, fuck you google and also I hate your stinking guts.

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2 Comments

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2 responses to “Dear google keyboard

  1. And also, in case I wasn’t clear in the body of my post,

    ALL HAIL SWYPE.

  2. I’ll have to look at Swype. We just got new phones last week. They’re awesome phones, love them. Google Keyboard is the default, and to say I’m less than thrilled would be putting it mildly…….